ok, well, yes.
let me just say, i hate my dad.
go back a few years. my dad cheats on my mom, takes some chick out to dinner at the portside. writes a bad check to boot. yeah, he's a bastard. my uncle writes one at the same place awhile later. they're both assholes. forward a few years, my mom divorces my dad, good idea, about time. things are good, we move, i make a few friends, one of whom is jessica, who's parents own the portside. after awhile, they realize i am the spawn of the bad check people. rage rage, must not have jessica around the dishonest people. therefore jessica can never stay the night at my house again, even though my dad's gone and my mom had nothing to do with it. so, i can either 1) pay the check myself because my dad/uncle sure as hell won't and my mom won't pay for them or 2) turn in my dad and my uncle. well, i don't really have a thousand dollars to just throw away, and i'm trying to have a relationship with my father (i don't know why, don't ask, it just feels like something i need to do) so i'm not gonna turn him in...so, i get to live knowing my best friend's parents hate mine. dammit. this sucks shit.

I have a message to all of my male Omniscientish(tm) friends out there: Women. Avoid with an extreme predjudice. Now im not talking about all of the fairer sex, just the majority of those who dwell in our lovely little chunk of Hades. To better prepare my friends I'm gonna list first a few warning signs that its time to stop all contact with said female, and start throwing rocks at them, as this is the only way they will leave you alone.

5 Warning signs

1. Calling you with nothing to say. This may seem sweet and stuff at first, but after the long silences, it starts to get creepy.
2. Talking about other guys. Now even if you have no romantic attraction to her, this is a sure sign that they view you as "another one of the girls" and this may lead to them telling you things you DONT want to know.
3. They come over, and wont leave. I've had this problem myself, you tell them you dont want to hang out and go inside, and the dumb bitch stays on your fucking lawn. Shoot these offenders on sight.
4. They call up crying, repeatedly. Now once or twice is fine and understandable, but there are some who think that its ok and do it alot. They, must be run down like small animals.
5. Baby talk. The number one killer of sperm cells, baby talk is the worst way to ensure a man will chase you down the street with a shovel.

Well then, now you know a few early warning signs, but there are some hose-beasts who are more devious.

The 3 worst tricks woman play.

1. The, "I want you to beg me to tell you something" game. Easiest way to defeat it: ignore it, they'll tell you anyway.
2. The, "Do i look good in this?" game. No right awnser. "YES!" "PIG! *slap*" "no." "JERK! *slap*"
3. The most devious, evil trick of all. "Read my mind!" game. They will just barely hint at something and expect you to know what they're thinking. If you assume and assume right, they expect you do get it right every time, if you assume and assume wrong, this usually ends up like their responce to game two. Dont assume at all they get frustrated. I'm sorry my friends, there is no way of winning this game unless you assume correctly.

Dont get me wrong, not all girls commit these immortal sins, but the ones that do, should die, sir.

Hey, if someone could help us out, and hook us up with a server to put pictures and stuff on, that would be greatly appreciated...you're going to love that pic that isn't showing in Jenna's post (now FIND US A SERVER!)

The premise of this post comes from half a month ago. What I was doing, was sitting around and stewing in my own apathy. This also ties into religion...but I will get to that. So I'm sitting, and I realize that all I do is eat, sleep, waste space and oxygen. Which lead to the sum conclusion that my existence was meaningless. You have no idea how bad it sucks to be in that position. Then I realized why people want religion...its something to live your life for when nothing else is left...nothing happening?? Live for god! It helps you avoid the nasty conclusion I came to. So instead of religiously studying the bible, I jump into the shower. I love my shower...seriously...it has high water rates so it actually is pimp...but I'll stop talking about that. From now on..when I say god..I mean my shower. Also, I completley forgot about my problems, so now when I'm about to have some epiphany or something, I will just hide in my shower for a while and come out changed by my intereations with "god"

ok, well, yes...

hey, can i post here too???

........

apparently so...security must be down...

Damn, sorry people, that i havn't posted anything. I was kinda expecting th other people to post more stuff then they are. But i'm going to Portland from early Friday to mid-Sunday, so i won't post anything for a while. Damn my peoples sucks at posting......

Well, with so many other people joining this blog, i'm about out of a job other then just being administrator. I'll still post stuff, i just know i'm ganna be really busy.

Anyway, i'll leave with one last scintilla of hope for us nice guys.

Oh, right, two more pieces of advice:
TANSTAFFL = There An't No Such Thing As A Free Lunch
and
No matter what, everything will randomly work out.
- Daniel The Man

Hmm, now time for some news. Did you know that a Hob is a male ferret? Neither did I, nor did I want to. Things are fucked up what with the Endangered Species Protection Act. Did you know that 4, count 'em 4, people died? Yeah, how is this differant from the millions of others who died today? They died because people were concerned about the water. Hopefully you've heard about it. You know how those helicopters and airplanes pick up water, and drop it on the fire? Well that was the plan, some firefighters out in the woods, had a fire pretty much under control. They just needed the water otherwise it would get outa control. They call in and request....time passes...8 hours later, the fire is a raging inferno, and people are dieing. This is just wrong...Human lives should not be lost to save fish. Thats the reason the plane never came with the water, the river where it would make a pickup, supposedly had protected fish inside...people died for that.

Well, at least THATS, over with. I hoped going to sleep would help. It did...of course. Damn coffee! I thought you were my friend, but you have forsaken me!

yep, sorry to anyone that I hurt with my actions last night

Hey that stupid bitch is dead!

Damn, she's dead

I never liked her anyway. Her music wasn't good, and the term Hobag Mc'Gee comes to mind

Have a good day

For all you "less gifted" people who don't know what "omniscient" means look it up!

Anyway, pardon my friend Jack, if you ever notice, all of the times when these posts are, it kinda figures that we sound so weird. Aside from this one, most of these are posted between mid-night and three AM.

Damn, I'm just posting this because I love Bob Dylan. We must all pay homage to his greatness.
I don't know, I've been in a very odd mood lately, I sit around, think, and then go biking. I go biking to think, but I don't; I thimk when I'm standing still. I'm beginning to think I need to take up something to fill the time in my life..
any suggestions? Email Jack Shuff

Well, Ann isn't pissed at me, Yay! Anyway, I'm not mad at sam anymore, but he just doesn't understand and i don't think he will, no big deal. And if you don't use iMesh then you need to be shot because it is the best music/file sharing program out. That is all...

Hey everybody, I might as well start this off with a bang
Go Here

Here's a link for you. This is happening in Minnesota as well..I seems the government is intent on pushing the people back from the water. In MN along lake Ranier, the lake has risen to 100 year flood levels (to those who don't know, a whole fucking lot), and the govermnet types in charge say they plan to keep it that way.

There is something wrong with this, the people who own the property are being forced back due to inconsiderate lake and river managment. Why is it that when someone takes the problem (and solution) into their own hands, the goverment steps in all a'raged. Its bullshit, I would never pay 100,000 or any part thereof, so that they could move the dirt and shit away...FROM A PROBLEM THAT THEY REFUSED TO DEAL WITH! If anybody cares to discuss this further

my Emails on the sidebar

Well, Jack Shuff is now ganna post stuff here. If you have any ideas of a better name or anything for this site, please tell me.